Spring Broke is just about over. It started out with a bang last Saturday. Did a 1-stop BBQ tour stop at a church’s barbecue stop and ended up at the Golden Nugget by nightfall. How did that happen? Didn’t win a single dime. The most I ever won was $370 and I hauled ass after that because I knew that wouldn’t have lasted long if I stayed.
I love casinos, not necessarily gambling. Casinos bring out the best-dressed yet worst-behaved people. The restaurants are usually awesome, the pool is usually fun and the bars have good drinks. After the casino was the 2 hour ride back to Houston, eyes were heavy and the day had defeated us.
After the bang, it has been quiet all week. I’ve been in the house chilling, watching TV, and taking naps which is cool. I’m sitting still because I need to watch my pocketbook. Miami is in June and I put myself on a…budget. I used to avoid that word. It sounds so limited, so drastic, so adult. The reality is that I’m spending too much and not saving enough. I have too much debt and not enough income. My credit score fucking sucks and I pay too much interest in the credit cards, car notes and other host of shit that I am financing.
It took a lot to type those last sentences. Usually, those are thoughts I push back in my head and ignore and pretend that it’s not that bad. So, I read a quote by Erykah Badu that said, “Write it down and watch shit get real.” Or something to that effect. I wrote down the current balance to my savings account and came up with a weekly (husband gets paid weekly) and month plan until April 15th). I am saving 10% of every paycheck and writing it down as a bill. Usually, I save whatever’s left (or nothing at all) which is nowhere near 10%.
Also, I am going to stop my husband from eating money up. He works a shift schedule and doesn’t like to pack a lunch, so he’ll go to Subway, Popeyes and other shitty fast food restaurants that are incredibly gross and cost too much. I’m a fat girl and I hate fast food. If I have to eat it because I didn’t pack a lunch, I am pissed. I digress…he spends anyway from $40-$100 on lunch, late night snacks, etc.
Instead, I’m going to pack his lunch for him. (What a nice wife.) Sit my ass down instead of wandering the mall. Stick to my plan on paper and pray for patience, understanding and guidance.
4th time is a charm.
Vegas and I have a love-hate relationship. I married in Vegas.I love the lights, sound, the seediness and the rare chance to strike it rich. I hate the overpriced drinks, crowds and guys with the “Orgasm Clinic” shirts passing out cards for hookers.
Massage, hours of sleep and a succulent buffet were the highlights of my trip. It was a blessing to go out of town with my family. I wish my husband could have went, but all is good in the hood. It’s amazing how profitable Vegas can be without changing anything. Some of the same shows that were there when I was 19 was still going on. How many times can you do the same routine?
I guess a check is a check.
I just want the simple things
I want you
I want my husband to be safe and secure in who he is and where he is in life. I know that he tries so hard to be the best him that he can be. Unresolved issues in his life has caused him to be insecure, incomplete and not enough for others. I believe that he is whole and complete. I want him to know that I love him with all my soul, not my heart. My heart will stop eventually, but my soul will live on.
I want my brother to come home from prison. 22 years is much too long. So much life has been lived in five years. People have been born and died in the time that he has gone. He has made some fucked up decisions and I wish I was aware on how bad they were. Maybe I could have did something to change his mind. I hate the justice system because they hang the petty thieves while the killers run free. Fucking America.
I want a true female friend. I want the type of friendship where we can see each other without makeup on a random Tuesday night while eating Chinese food. It would be cool to go on road trips and reminisce on embarrassing moments. I have friends, but it’s like they are phone friends and they live in the same city. Which really sucks. Maybe it’s me and I am not a good friend.
Instead of wanting, I need to realize that I have.
I have a husband who is funny, hardworking and a deep thinker.
I have an intelligent brother who loves to read the Bible.
I have 2 sisters who I love to hang out with.
a pair of Chanel sunglasses because I always wanted a pair since college
double-pane windows so I won’t hear cars pass by while I am in the bed
to stop bleeding so I can stop financing Kotex and Always (fucking fibroids!)
to take my braids down so I can see how long my hair is
to watch Season 2 of HTGAWM on the Netflix (Hurry the fuck please!)
I want my friend to hurry up and pay for her plane ticket
20-30 tops to wear to brunch, church and the bar
5-6 pairs of wedges or heels that support my flat feet
for the 4th time.
What can I say? I can’t turn down a getaway. It’s gonna be lit bc my friend is coming along with my sisters and my mama. So, it’s like 8 of us going. Which is really cool because it’s last minute and it kinda worked out. Which is great because shit never really works out with us. We have issues getting together for dinner on a weekday. I am really excited to hang out with my friend who has never been to Vegas or a plane. It’s really cool because I have the travel bug and I just want to go everywhere.
March- New Braunfels/BBQ Tour in Hill Country
April-??? (Sit my ass down and save money)
May-:( 😦 :(Try to hustle some money to move into a new place
Hopefully, everything works out. Hopefully, I can be an adult and save for trips.
Been gone a few days and no one is checking for me.
And I think I kinda like it.
I think most bloggers want a huge following with tons of comments, followers and activity. I think people like the numbers, but it does come with some stress.
Can you write honestly while appealing to the masses? You can, but you will probably piss some people off. Or you could have a great following who agrees with your every word. Personally, I am a lurker. I usually read the comments and discuss the topic with my husband.
I am not big on social media. Not on facebook, tumblr, etc. Just got an instagram last summer. I like it, but most of my followers want me to buy a waist trainer, bundles of weave or some weight loss pill. So, my followers obviously don’t like me the way that I am.
Yes, life will be some much better with a snatched waist, 20 inch hair and slimmer thighs.
Why is it so hard to make friends after college?
Speaking of that, I am 31 and most of my friends I talk to on the phone, but hardly ever see. Get this, we live in the same city. My best friend lives less than 10 miles away and I saw her 3-4 times last year. I get it that people have responsibilities, kids, families and all of that other shit, but if we are really cool, we are really cool. I mentioned this to her the few times I saw her, but now I am over it. It sounds petty as fuck, but I am going to put as much energy into you as you are into me. So where do people find friends? I found my husband on Craigslist and that worked out fine. Do I make an ad? Join a club? I’m confused.
He didn’t die for civil rights.
He was assassinated by the government.
In 1999, the US government admitted guilt and gave the King family $100 for their grief.
Land of the Free. Home of the Brave.
And people have the nerve to get offended when we say ‘Black Live Matters’.
Not to be on some resolution shit because I hate that shit. I feel more of a fresh start when the school year starts in August than in January. Lately, I’ve been really on some focused shit. Professionally, I am happy. I work at a school where I like the people and the kids are pretty decent. Plus, I live a mile away. So, that’s what’s up.
Financially, I am a work in progress.
Sallie Mae or Navient or whoever the fuck they want to be today is still riding my hood, but Ima take care of that. I’ve been saving my coins and been more focused on mindless spending which is a HUGE problem for me. Last night, I went to Nordstrom Rack and didn’t spend a dime. I had some earrings (2 pairs) in the basket, but I said no. It was only gonna be like $20, but still. Like I said, I’m on some focused shit.
Personally, I’ve been on some truth with myself and others. Not the harsh, ugly type of truth, but the type of truth you tell someone without them wanting to bash your head in when you walk away. I have tact, love. I live in the South. My makeup skills are improving and my skin is getting clear at a glacial pace, but it’s all good.
So far this school year, I used a day and half of my vacation time.
This is a record for me because I usually blow through 5-7 days by now.
When I was in school, I never got perfect attendance. I used to scoff at the kids who made perfect attendance for the year. It was an accomplishment for me to attend school on a Monday. Jerry Springer used to have the best episodes on Monday and Fridays. I know this because I used stay home and watch.